A big thank you to Craftgirl78 and Raven/Missy for your encouragement and support. I have been feeling really bad with my depression and pain and to have your comments really means a lot to me.
As far as giving up smoking goes, I think I will wait until I'm feeling stronger. I know it sounds like the usual excuse not to stop but I do not want to set myself up to fail I have many other things that I feel I have failed at so I don't need another one to add to it.
I'm meeting a good friend today that I met at a pain support group, that sadly that is no longer around. I will have to find the strength to get myself together to go. Don't get me wrong I do want to see her but at the moment I really want to isolate myself and not see anyone. This is a big problem I have when I'm feeling really depressed and I know it's not good for me to give in because it only makes it worst. It's very hard not to give in and find a cave somewhere and hide from life. The amount of energy it takes just to have a shower is ridiculous, I hate it that depression can leave you feeling so tired all the time.
Time to go and get ready, I hope. Have a nice day.